Postal: Paradise Lost is a DLC expansion pack set after the events of Postal 2. After a nuclear explosion our protagonist “The Dude” has been in a 12-year radioactive coma and upon awaking sets out to find his dog in the now post-apocalyptic Paradise city. The once familiar streets are now roamed by bandits, self-imposed sheriffs and worst of all, game developers. Yes, even after surviving a nuclear blast they are still spurning out titles such as Equality Simulator and Farmageddon which I would admittedly like to play. After some time asking the bizarre locals about the whereabouts of your dog you’ll once again be given a few basic daily tasks to complete at your own pace.
Like Postal 2 you are free to explore or terrorize random pedestrians to your hearts content. It is the same city though it has been changed enough that it feels like a new world to explore, especially taking into account the nuclear winter and nonstop rain in some areas. Not all of the map is able to be accessed from the get go, more and more areas will be unlocked as you survive another of the overall 5 days. To help you survive are various new additions such as a female vibrator, MP5 and two new shotguns to mow down your foes.
One of the more interesting additions is a drink that lets you dual wield most weapons for a short time. Running around blasting people with akimbo combat shotguns should be a ton of fun but it is sadly still the same mediocre Postal 2 gameplay. Everyone that is not a regular pedestrian is still able to take far too much damage, have pinpoint precision alongside hit-scan weapons and do not flinch when shot meaning they will not stop firing until dead. As an expansion pack it obviously will not reinvent the combat system, it is just worth mentioning that the new weapons in your arsenal are still not all that fun to use.
With that being said the main appeal of Postal 2 has always been its dark, offensive humor and it is back in full force. It is impressive how the developers, Running With Scissors, have not only retained their humor after so many years, but are more insane than ever. The Dude also retains the same voice actor so even if it has been 12 long years since the last RWS expansion pack, it nearly feels like I’m the one that’s been in a coma and missed out on a classic addition to Postal. Needless to say, if you did not enjoy the original base game you will not enjoy this.
By far my favorite new addition is the introduction to vending machines that dish out weapons and items in exchange for cash. That fixes the problem of money being useless outside of missions and actually makes you want to put yourself in danger to avoid paying up a good chunk of cash in exchange for a quest item such as toilet paper. Another method of getting money is to catch cats and sell it to some crazy NPC. It basically makes two gimmicks into legitimate gameplay features that allow you to afford some more crack pipes or body armor.
I’ve experienced a few crashes and scripted event errors such as a mining drill not creating a path, causing me to reload though they were infrequent enough not to be that big of a deal. Considering this expansion pack is as long, if not longer than the base Postal 2 game, a few crashes over a 7+ hour playthrough is nothing major. Unfortunately, their frequent inclusions of boss fights do become an annoyance. The combination of mediocre at best gameplay and giving bosses an absurd amount of health ruined what should have been enjoyable moments.
One such case is facing Zack Ward who was the actor that played The Dude in the surprisingly decent Postal movie. You can stand there blasting him with akimbo assault rifles for several seconds at a time to barely make a dent in his health bar. They are simply no fun and it is often tempting to cheese the fights by getting high on catnip. The music that plays during them and the main menu theme are pretty great which is a plus. To finish off the negatives the insta-kill traps and platforming sections are back for better or worse but there are so few of them and the fact that you can quick save makes it less than a minor quibble.
Paradise Lose stays very true to its roots, carrying over all of the flaws and positives that made Postal 2 into a cult classic. It is just as fun as ever to explore your environments and approaching tasks in different ways that lead to significant changes. Exploring the familiar environments, meeting old friends & enemies as well enjoying Postal’s humor on modern topics makes purchasing this a no brainier for fans. Add to that its low price and sheer amount of content makes this the prime example of DLC done right. Having spent the entirety of my weekend laughing at crude dick jokes and catching cats I have only one thing to say. I regret nothing.