Blessings on This Flat Loli (R18+) Review

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Blessings on This Flat Loli is a 2D Platformer that takes place in the Konosuba light novel series, though most know it by its anime adaptation. It takes place sometime in the early parts of the story in where Megumin practices her explosion magic daily on a Demon General’s castle. Naturally, he is none too pleased with this, and here is where the plot goes astray just a tad from the source material. The Demon General, instead of wanting to smack her head off with his massive sword, alternatively intends to get all up inside her with his other massive ‘sword’. Yup, this is a hentai game in case you missed the R18+ rating on the title.

One of the first things you’ll notice upon booting it up is that it’s entirely in Japanese. To change it into English, simply click on the third option of the main menu and tap the setting above resolution to reach your language. It states it supports English on the Dlsite store page, yet that is kind of a half-truth. You’ll find that random parts of the dialogue have not been translated throughout your journey. The story is far from essential, though it is something more than worth mentioning. While not particularly important, the writing here does tend to be rather humorous. The quality of its pretty poor English translation ironically aids the writing here. All the parts that have been left untranslated are distracting and an objective negative, however.

So, the Demon General is pissed and wants to show the bone of his sword to Megumin. Unfortunately for us, we play as Megumin. Despite the genre on the store page being Action, this is actually a platformer in where we must move fast enough to escape him. There is no combat here. Only in two points of the entire game can we cast her explosion spell, which then stuns all enemies for a brief time. Afterward, we can barely move at a plodding speed, thanks to the exhaustion of casting her spell. It is very faithful to how her character is in the light novel and quite a clever way to get us to flee instead of standing our ground. With the Demon General always at our heels, we never have the time to cast the explosion spell that takes absolute ages to cast.

You use the arrow keys to move, Shift to run, and the Spacebar to jump. It is a simple control scheme, and there is sadly no gamepad support. Most of the level design consists entirely of running to the right of the screen and avoiding any obstacles as the General slowly but surely closes the distance from the left. Of course, that is easier said than done. The enemies found here have a pretty massive sprite box, leaving little room for error in your jumps over them. From frogs, pigs, slugs, and flying cabbages, it seems that nature in its entirety has turned against you. I guess the wildlife isn’t a fan of her explosion magic leaving craters everywhere either. So they decide to punish her if they come into contact with Megumin. Punish with their penis. Yeah, even the bloody cabbages grow some love sausage to get womb deep into you.

There is nothing too extreme here. All of the sex is vanilla vaginal penetration and oral. The part that may bother some people is that a large portion of it involves animals, as well as the youthful look of our character. Sex is a two-part process caused by bumping into an enemy. If you have health remaining, it is just foreplay that you can mash the movement keys to get out of. Your health will rapidly be draining during foreplay, however, making it quite dangerous. Once your life bar is empty, that is where the full-on sex occurs, and you are forced back to the last checkpoint after seeing the animations. It is a more challenging game than its lovely art style would have you believe. You’ll very likely be seeing quite a number of them throughout this four-level adventure.

You’ll hop, climb, and make risky jumps to escape the General. Bumping into an enemy and being forced into foreplay is a dangerous waste of time. I did find shaking off enemies to be tedious. Doing so simply takes too many key presses that force you to mash your keyboard like crazy. I’d much have preferred your health draining even more rapidly if that meant shorter amounts of presses were needed. Being caught by the General is not any more dangerous than any other foe. Simply shake him off when he catches you to stun him for a bit and continue fleeing. The high number of key presses makes even less sense when you take that into account.

You’ll journey through beautiful grasslands, magical cave systems, and an epic lava-filled environment. Each of the four stages have their own unique look and gimmick to them. They also feature some enemies exclusive to that region. That last statement is significant considering all of the sex animations do not unlock from beating the game. To have free access to all the H content in the Gallery Mode, it is necessary to first get caught by a foe. I’m not a fan of this system. This forces the player to decide to lose on purpose or to replay the level again later. With four levels, it lasted me around 20 minutes in total. It is not a big time sink to unlock everything, yet unfortunate that simply beating the title won’t do. As for the quality of the H content, it is all pretty darn decent. It doesn’t involve much interaction from the player aside from clicking next to get to the following sequence, but graphically it looks quite nice.

The goal for each stage is simply to reach Kazuma, who is also fleeing the Demon General. He puts Olympic athletes to shame with how fast he runs and is never in any direct danger, unlike us. If you’re familiar with Konosuba and know about his pantie stealing ways, I’d say we’re in as much danger being near him. So, how is Blessings on This Flat Loli in general? It is a pretty fun romp through four short levels and offers enough of a challenge to be interesting. You’ll get about half an hour’s worth of gameplay during your first playthrough, and it is very dense with the amount of H content within them. Even if you lose repeatedly, you will likely be seeing new sex animations each time. It is short, humorous, and of such high visual quality that any fan of the Megumin character will enjoy it. I do wish it was fully translated or at least stated it isn’t a complete translation somewhere on the store page, though at least there’s a demo to try beforehand. This won’t set the H game industry on fire, yet this explosive little title was a pleasant experience.

Rating:

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